Ohana! :D

I love how the family protects over me when they think he's bullying me. The mom will always make sure that I'm treated well else she will slaughter him; The dad will always ensures that everything is fine and reminds me that he's actually a good boy and if he treats me bad he will slaughter him, too. The sister always motivates, assures me and help pull myself together when I'm not okay. I love how we have heart to heart talk at nights, be it with the dad only, or Mom or Denise. The dad told me that they are always on my side, and D is on his own, so if anything happens, they are always there. haha how cute! The mom even investigated him and thought that he has something on out there! They always tell me that I'm a part of their family and thank me for being so patient with him. haha! This is just like my second home here. I feel loved and assured. (: Even the dog is on my side everytime we quarrel! She will just only bark at him non stop, be it my fault or his. I never regret knowing this lovely family; how much unconditional lovessss they have given me, experiences and knowledge that they taught me, it's countless. I dare to say that I love them more than I love him, to be frank. I'm so lucky to have them. (:

I'm going to leave you for good, someday, somehow, I can do it; watch me.

My chum

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life…"

— Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman’s Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia) Extracted from Matilda's tumblr. Great post isn't. I've always thought that soul mate has to be the one that shares common interests and hobbies with you, do the same things together and think alike as you. However, that's not true at all though. A soul mate should be the one that makes you a better person; and even if you face obstacles, he/she should always be there to lift you up as if you are able to tackle the world no matter what. The best kind of love is the love that has no expectations at all. So have you found yours? (:

Final Year Project ended, finally. Presentation went quite smooth and thanks to the sleepless nights, I have extremely dark circles now. 4 more days to 3 weeks holidays, then 1 week exam and next 4 weeks holidays again. The only thing I would wish to do is hibernation BUT! too bad I gotta work and read up for next FYP. I did quite bad for this semester I'm sure. My daily grades are quite awful and UT grades aren't that acceptable as well, at least to me. This means that my GPA will drop again, gotta buck up for the last semester already since I'm graduating. I wonder whether I can get into U or not. Everyone keeps pressurizing me about getting a degree. So far it's not really in my list though. At times I hate people asking me what am I gonna do after graduating from poly because I really don't know yet. I feel that my path is so vague and unsure. I'm sure that I am able to enter U with my current GPA, it's just whether I want it or not. Main reason is money. They told me I could work first and save money for degree next time, which I doubt it's easy. Imagine with your salary minuses off your accommodation, living expenses and transportation. How much can you exactly save per month or year? Kinda unrealistic to me. Loan? I don't like the feeling of owing people for life, it's just like everyday debts. Considering part time degree. I REALLY DON'T KNOW. Another reason is that, I don't feel like studying anymore. HAHA! well, to be more exact, I don't know which path to choose; definitely not IT, and business is a lil hmm neutral. I'm more of an artsy person, definitely will be interested in those events or production side. But, in the end it still links back reason 1. On the brighter side, D is going to Kuching with me this September! My mom is more excited than me, like seriously. She offered and kept asking me to make him go hmm. Well hopefully we will enjoy the food and hospitality there, except for my aunties & uncles' all the 'wa-grown-up-and-so-tall-already-ah'! Mom is switching to a new environment, well not exactly new but I'm still happy for her. Finally she made a right decision and stood on her ground. It's funny that she always ask for my opinion and tells me everything nowadays. D said she's just like a sister to me. She always respect my decision and never really stops me from doing anything since young. I guess she trusts me and treats me like an adult. YAY! Till here then. Tata! (:

wimman

A lot of times I thought I get angsty when I'm having PMS. After doing experiment/statistic for months, I can conclude that it's not my PMS that causes problems. At least I'm not being unreasonable.